"You got Mail Enhancement"

(Music: Key, McReynolds - Lyrics: Key, Kersey, McReynolds, Preiss)

If you should ever decide you want to start a career in internet
marketing. If you engage in spam there's something you should know
that I will hunt you down and

I'll destroy you.

I get online, then notice I have email
I click my inbox, and see
ah, what the fuck?
20 emails, all coming from the same guy.
I don't why he's concerned about my penis size.

And what is this? I've won a brand new Xbox?
I click the link and I get fifty popups.
Try to close 'em, my PC takes a shit on me.
There is no rubber for electronic STDs.

For every spam I get I'm gonna make you eat your own shit.
For every spam I get I'm gonna choke you with your own dick.

Thank you for ruining the internet fuck face.
Donkey balls.
Cooter cream.
Dick.

I get rebooted, and get back to my email.
I got some forwards, a lame joke from my mom.
Keep on searching, for anything legitimate.
I got a feeling, I'll never end up finding it.
And what is this? Shania Twain all nekkid!
I click the link and I get dicks on the screen!
Endless dickage, colossal disappointment.
I'm gonna find you and slay you with enjoyment.

For every spam I get I'm gonna smash in your face with a brick.
For every spam I receive you're gonna get to gargle your pee.
For every spam I get later I'm gonna rub your face on a cheese grater.
For every spam you send me I'm gonna do something like really not good!

Thank you for ruining the internet shit lick.
Penis steak.
Anal butter.
Cunt.

Back to all lyrics.

Tom Cruise probably hates us.