Jolly Old Sadist

(Lyrics: Key, Kocian - Music: Key, Kocian)

Santa didn't keep his promise, so he's getting his cookies
and milk NO MORE

All I wanted to get for Christmas was a Boba Fett
Still in original packaging, but Santa has abandoned me

And I wanted me a new guitar
with EMGs and a whammy bar

I don't know why that's so much to ask
I was good this year, but now I'm beatin' some ass because

Santa's a bastard ‘cuz he wouldn't give me what I wanted for
Santa's an asshole ‘cuz he didn't give me what I wrote on my
Santa's all shady ‘cuz he won't deliver on the things that he
Santa's so lazy making children suffer like a jolly old sadist.


All I wanted to get for Christmas was a private jet
with a stuardess named Angelina Jolie
but Santa has forsaken me

And I wanted just like every year
a new liver and a truck of beer

I've been so nice and real patient too
but Kris Kringle's got a lot of explaining to do because


Santa brought a bunch of socks.

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